Sunday, March 11, 2007

Virgin blog!

I've finally created a blog! I've been thinking about it for a minute, but couldn't get round to doing it. I'm a bloody huge procrastinator if i might say so myself. But Baba Alaye and Bimbylads have inspired me! A little bit about me: I'm a naija boy(man) in my early-mid twenties......recently moved back to London, after studying and living in New york for the past 5 years. I never thought I'd come back to this wack-ass city, but when one school like that gave me admission to do my master's, omo i couldn't say no o. U know one of those schools that u have on ur CV and ur supposedly set for life? Well, we'll see now. I get done this year, and I'm facing Naija straight.....the prayer is that I pass the bloody exams.

As in this is the hardest shit I've ever done in my life. In Yankee, I was one of the smartest guys in every class I had. At this school, omo I no dey even open mouth for class. Let me give u a typical seminar conversation;

Dr. Thatcher-"Mr. Fineboy, what do you think are the implications of Black's Median voter theorem on the U.S. legislative system and how would it have been significant in the outcomes of the 2004 U.S. elections?"

At this point, all these former Harvard geeks and Oxford chaps turn to me....the token black guy.

My heart is pounding like crazy at this point......Chai! Omo! This fucking guy wan disgrace awon boys ni sha! What the fuck is Median Voter Theorem?????Who told me not to do the readings o? Last night I was looking at December Naija pictures on ofoto and looking at strangers' pages on hi5!

Me-"Err...the median voter theorem is very significant in U.S. politics. Looking at the last U.S elections and the margins between both candidates....one can only make a direct inference. For example, in the 1999 democratic elections in Nigeria we saw president Olusegun Obasanjo of the PDP win a decisive victory. Even in that case, you see the Median voter theorem at work....

Everybody's starts staring at me at this point, and even the professor's probably thinking "WTF did this joker just say? Wetin consign Obasanjo with Median Voter?" The guy can't be bothered to even discuss it further with me and starts talking about something else.

Men, na so i dey always escape hot water for this fucking school o! I'm sure everybody just wonders why the hell i dodge every question and talk about Nigeria, b'cos they obviously don't know shite about it. Na their wahala be that.

School is not the only thing that's difficult about this city. In America, I had my own crib, a phat ride, and a correct job. In this jand, I have to hop on that bloody underground everyday, with oyinbo people frowning face for no reason. The other day, on my way to Uni, I was sat across this middle-aged oyinbo man that was just staring directly at me, with a frown on his face. I made up my mind not to stop looking at the twat, and the guy too didnt stop o. We sat there for like a minute, just boning up at each other. That's how one fat fuck that was getting off the train just left one pungent mess o!!! Men i didn't even hear anything...but that thing smelt like a bag of rotten eggs! Kai! Oyinbo mess is always on another level o! And the crazy thing is that nobody even behaved as if anything had happened. Omo, i stopped staring at that were and just got up and walked to the next door! Bloody hell!

Anyway, I'm rambling now...so I'll start hittingyou guys up with daily gist tomorrow. So much to tell y'all!Peace!

42 comments:

Vickii said...

Welcome to blogville ... it's good to finally hear from this person who I have met, but can't figure out!

I can't believe you don't like London, it's an amazing city ... not as much fun day to day, but pretty great anyways!

Mr.Fineboy said...

Hehe I actually used to love living in London until I moved to the states...Thanks for stopping by and leaving a comment Vickii!

cool muthafucka said...

hehe! men you're spot on....i smell eggy oyinbo on daily basis!
Funny thing is everyone will now be inhaling & exhaling with a smile on their face.....iyama!

Mr.Fineboy said...

Haha@ cool mutha...thanks for stopping by!

bimbylads said...

LMAOOOO!! ur nuts.. glad i inspired u o.. welucome my buroda.. lOLLL!!

LondonBuki said...

WELCOME!!!

londonnaijachic said...

welcome to blogsville.Another clown in the building!

law_damsel said...

welcome oh!! and yes i know dat wheelchair dude @silverbird, met him over d xmas as well, actualloy he's a nomad, he's also in fornt of the dstv office where u make payments.lolllllllllllllllllllllll

Mr.Fineboy said...

LOL@lawdamsel, thanks 4 stopping by...

Cherub (former Bijouxoxo) said...

Welcome o Mr. fine boi. So na so u dey do siddon look for class. I tell u Naija's have been blessed with agbari. The way, we can evade questions sha. Let's see what u've got to say.

Mr.Fineboy said...

lol...thanks for stopping by Cherub.

Calabar Gal said...

Welcome to Blogville, I couldnt help laughing at the oyibo leaving one pungent mess for you cos I'm guilty of having done the same myself on the tube. It was a silent one but quite pungent too and the oyibo's around me couldnt help but twist their noses but were too polite to say a word. I was standing by the door though gigling to my heart's content.

Confused Naija Girl said...

welcome to blogville
i will add you to my blog roll!
you are funny oh , like a mini baba alaye!~

Mr.Fineboy said...

lol @Calabar Girl...ewwww!, and thanks Confused...respect to baba alaye, the godfather of blogvile politics!

cool muthafucka said...

ehnnn?? Calabar gal so you dey compete for mess olympics with oyinbos on the tube??
From their reaction that mess must have come straight from Iboland! God help us innocent ones on the tube o..

bhookey84 said...

wow, sounds like one of my classes, international relations/public relations perrrapssss????

yankeenaijachick said...

Na wa oooooo. ......fine boy no pimples. U sure say you fine abi u be wowo guy. Anyways, thanks for stopping by my blog. l will keep checking ur blog. Welcome and why you leave yankee go london. U no know say london be like Naija. Just 6 hours away from Naija. U for do ur masters for yankee. Anyways, fine boy no pimples...welcome to naija blog world.

Mr.Fineboy said...

lol@yankeenaijachick, Wowo?? Haha, mo bad gan o! Thanks 4 stopping by!

Mona said...

Welcome to blogville - 1 million have sent me ur blog to read so I have graced u with my presence hehehe :P ok so I'll be frequenting here more -- keep us entertained xx

Mr.Fineboy said...

Thanx 4 comin' thru Mona!

adumaadan - Blacktinkerbell said...

Thank you for the invite. Now that everyone's gone home, had a chance to sit down and read your blog properly.I'v been sitting here laughing and if I keep it up, they'll take me away in a strait jacket...

soza said...

Like u, i used to live in london and now just completed a program in NY all for having the accolades for naija.. not feeling this yankke at all... and cannot wait to blaze to naija men... nice blog...luv it when i see chaps that see what other people dont see in Nigeris "opportunity".. i dey always tell people say make dem open their eye well well.. naij.. is whree its @

Mr.Fineboy said...

Thanks adu! Soza, you're damn straight bro! naija is where the action is! Thanx 4 stopping by!

Anonymous said...

Mr. Fineboy... Your blog is funny as hell. I am Based in London too, I think London can be good if you have the right resources especially financial. But thats not the issue - the issue is that you have inspired me to start my own blog. Omo, I didnt do anything at work after my lunch break I spent the whole afternoon reading your blog - but it took a while cos I had to code it. You know how the work envron is now - too much busy bodies - plus if my manager should catch me, i done die!

Watch out for me sha - I am trying to think of a name for myself now.

cool muthafucka said...

You are thinking of a name abi? hmm lets see which one will suit you perfectly...
how about "Olori Ede" (shrimphead)

Jack Bloggs said...

Cool guy... (not tryn to say the opposite). Why would you want me to call myself shrimp head... You had the option and you chose to call yourself cool mutha... Think real hard and tell me who should be called "Olori Ede".

Mr.Fineboy said...

Thanx 4 coming thru coolmutha!
@Jack Bloggs-glad I inspired u!Thanx 4 comin' thru!

cool muthafucka said...

lol @ jack bloggs
ah ah this guy chill now, why e dey pain you? The name suit you for real lol

Relax mr man abi you no dey take joke? As you can see we are having fun here, otu

bimbylads said...

coolmutha: PLS START a BLOG!! u r a joker.. lollll ....


ewwwwwwwwwooooo wetin be dis!! comment moderation..???
CHOP KNUCKLE FINEBOY"!!! awon enemies wa, won le'nu nbe.. ( them no get mouth)

tufi!! lai lai! they will not prosper..
wait o.. why the hell am i commenting on a very old post?? wo, im going home.. AOL is s'pposed to call me back at 7 ( awon were oshodi !)... laters!

omohemi Benson said...

Welcome to blgsville boy.
I am adding you to my blog roll,now now.
U got my sides aching.
I wanna feel the ache always.

Idemili said...

Kai! Why you get Mrs Fineboy now eh? Ohhhh God! You mess o! LOL

Ade said...

finally - read all ur posts, really cool, after the first one kinda get where u're coming from a lot more. Nice!

Overwhelmed Naija Babe said...

hello mr. fineboy... k you're one of those bloggers that absolutely everybody talks about. I know you've been here once or twice but I never really got to read a main post. i sha dont know why oh... perhaps i've saved the best for last. so today i've made it my job to read every single thing you've written on this blog so today i've decided to read this blog from top to bottom.. so don't be alarmed if you see my comment on like every single thing you've written here oh.. cos today na me and u... (hehe doesn't that sound a tad bit stalkerish?!)

lmao@looking at strangers pictures on hi5 and your obasanjo theorem..thats just bloody genius.. i'll do that if i ever choose to take a poli. sci course again(i almost hate that crap)...

eww@oyinbo mess... i don dey this canada how many years now and i never smell that one.. thank GOd for small miracles... lol..

Anonymous said...

You probably went to LSE.....go figure!

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